Saturday, December 31, 2011

HI 2012, BYE BYE 2011

salam.

1) it's kinda sad to leave 2011 when you realize that you have achieved nothing much. especially when there was a long holiday that made you lazier and increased your weight.sigh.

2) i've been thinking a lot about my achievements this year and they are so little to be proud of. basically, nothing. hurmmm..let's think about the changes of myself. yeah, it becomes worse when it comes to financial part. Spending a lot of money on food,food and food and then regretting about it. Suddenly i feel like i'm so pathetic.

Fortunately, Abah always says "habiskan duit untuk makan takpe." hehe :D

3) Two of my midterm papers were doomed. Luckily, not that bad. At least, my carry marks might help and there are still finals!

4) Now, let's find the good things. Hurmmm..I manage to sleep early almost everyday in this sem. It's good to have your biological cycle back as normal. Finishing all the assignments before the dateline, means that my procrastination level is between low and medium. hurrmm..a good achievement indeed!

5) The weather in Kuantan is not stable. Well, it's the monsoon season so, just get ready with socks and comforter! It's so cold until I can't walk on the floor without the slippers. Ok fana, how to survive later in UK? :S

6) Jibah is going to be 22 in few days! Oucchhh!

7) How fast the time flies. My cousin was married few weeks ago and today, my second cousin is having his reception. and I can't attend any of them. T_T

8) Suddenly, this marriage thingy makes me worry. Anim told me that my aunt asked her about me having any bf yada yada yada. Ohhh.. that's disaster! How should I avoid these questions later?Now, I'm thinking of not going back to kampung this coming holiday.HAHA. and for sure Abah will not let me do that.

 9) Dear aunts, I'm still young. What's the point of rushing? Let me go through this beautiful,exciting and adventure journey of learning peacefully. I have my own ambitions and goals. DON'T BOMBARD ME WITH THOSE BF/HUSBAND/MARRIAGE QUESTIONS. Seriously I don't feel like answering them. Let Allah decides when will it be.

10) I hope I can score the finals. I'm working hard and dilligently now. Ya Allah, please ease everything for me and my friends.

11) I miss home! I miss tv!sobs sobs

12) Izzuddin is going to attend the primary school already! Oh, our "baby" has grown up.  No more "baby" in our house anymore after this I guess. So sad. Maybe we can call him Adik Iz ? Glamour! :P

13) I really hope my sister will get one of the MRSMs. I don't want her to study in that "school" which I know how the students behave. It gives me goosebumps when I think about how spoiled they are. and I always refer them as "budak teruk" (sorry, no offense.A general hypothesis actually) especially the school that's next to that "school". I can't imagine how she can study in a school like that.

14)  You are my friend but I think we are big enough to decide everything especially those simple matters. Don't call me and wasting your credit just to ask the easy peasy questions!

15) I'm sorry for writing it here. It just bothers me a lot and I don't have the guts to tell you straight in your face.

till then.






Thursday, December 22, 2011

fear

dear blog,

the truth is now I'm sacred of everything. really scared.I'm now in confusion and don't know who should I share this fear with.so far, I don't have anyone that is willing to share this fear.I won't blame them for that.

but Allah will. I know I should tell Him. Tell him and hope He will ease everything. I know He will listen.

He is the Most Gracious and the Best Listener indeed.


Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Suffering

salam and hi people!

now I know what :/ means.but now I'm confused what does :s mean? -.-" I'm bad with symbols.

the past two weeks were hectic. and crazy. and tiring. and and and... well, whining doesn't help much now. sigh.



******************************************************************************
16 Dec 2011

I dislike myself this week . but not too much.maybe just a little bit. It's like I'm in the self-destruction mode.Everything I did for the past few days really upsetting me. Like the EAW thingy.

I am not really interested in language that needs me to sit for an exam. but if learning the language is just for fun, for extra knowledge, I can still handle it.

but seriously not this one. EAW made me tired and deprived my sleep. I had to go through sleepless nights for a long period. Which is really not nice. Yesterday, I presented my report. Finally. and after going through so many hardships. even though the preparation done was just a so- so.

but still I had put a lot effort in it. I practiced for zillion times, trying to keep my presentation in time. Planning the attention grabber was the most exciting part that made me couldn't wait to present. But what happened during the presentation? I spoke like a train. or like a person who's trying to catch a train. or a bullet train. any kinds of train would do, depends on you.I had to skip few slides and info. plus the jumbled up grammars and sentence structures. and the most important thing, I had to  forget the attention grabber! ='(
All this happened because the report should be presented in 8 minutes only! 23 pages of report people!

It took me 22 minutes to finish my presentation during the rehearsal. But I managed to present just in 8 min and 39 sec yesterday. That 39 sec was due to some interruptions. I guess so. Isn't that amazing? :/ Even taking a breath scared me much. just in case i would exceed 8 min, which I did. Luckily, I didn't exceed more than 1 min or else my marks would be penalized.

It's not a presentation that I can be proud of. It annoys me when I think about it now.

Last night, we went hunting for food in Mega. Just trying the new pizza and eating other delicacies. We were so hungry at that time until everything served was finished in the blink of eyes. More and more empty plates were passed to the waiters. When it came to the main dishes, everyone was so excited.

But the service was so poor. and awful. The waitress just put a stack of plates with the cutlery in front of us. Which for me, it is rude. How come they charge so much for that terrible service? :/

We went for some groceries shopping at Giant.  The clumsy cashier plus my carelessness had cost me RM9. She scanned the milk thrice while I just bought two of them. I just realized about that when we were on our way back to UIA. I know I should check the receipt first but at that time we had to rush to search for a gift in Parksons that had already ready to be closed. Now, thinking of that cashier really made me pissed off!

Oh, What a day!

Today, I have another presentation. UNGS Presentation. The preparation is done so last minute. Luckily I have to present about 3 slides. but still I couldn't manage to present well. I mix all the info. I miss some important things. I forget about the hadith I have written in the cue cards. All info just happen to lost at that time.

All this happen because I'm worried about my EAW final draft. I am not able to pick it today. In the end of the day, madam ask me to pick it on Monday, which means I have to sacrifice my morning time and go to KOS just for that final draft. -.-"

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17 Dec 2011

Another presentation for today as well as the end for all exhaustion. Our group is the last one to present. Alhamdulillah, we manage to finish the presentation and end our sufferings. The best part is I'm the first presenter so I am the first person who ends the nervousness. but the worst part is, I present 2 slides only instead of three. I forget about that. Thus my colleague needs to cover that part for me. What a terrible me.
Because of that, during Q&A session, I choose to be silent rather than trying to answer.

hrmmm.. our banner, as expected receives a not really good comment. Well, it's an art people. Arts can be anything, abstract. Arts is not straight, and fixed. Different people have different vision. Unluckily, your vision is not the same as mine.

Well, at least the panelists are interested with our idea. Maybe the programme proposed makes him reminiscing his childhood. thus, asking us to conduct traditional games that we never heard of.

Tawakal is the only thing I can do now. We plan, Allah does the rest.

Anyway...

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Weak Weekend

The internet is super duper slow.Dear IIUM WiFi, you're getting on my nerve!so irritating. :/

Salam and hi people!

First of all, I don't know what this :/ stands for. I just use it anywhere I like.

Yesterday, Abah called and told me Anim is going for an interview at Shah Alam this coming Tuesday. The SPC interview for The Fast Track Programme perhaps. The programme that is based on the Trial result allows you to start your study before the actual SPM result is out. The one that I couldn't apply when I was Form 5 due to some reasons. Oh my, I am so jealous!


She's so lucky for getting this opportunity as she has worked hard for the past 2 years. I can see that. In fact, all of us can see that. I mean, who will stay quietly studying and doing Add Math exercises while everyone is having fun watching telly during Hari Raya? But she will. And she did. Until one of my aunts wishes that their son will be like her. And she got 9 A's for her Trial. It's not impossible for her to get the same result for SPM too.

I am imagining how it will be if me and her are in the same university, ok it's not necessary to be in the same U but somewhere in overseas (how I wish I can study in London even the cost is so killing me), and living under one roof. I am doing my Masters while she's doing her Undergrad studies there. Won't it be exciting? I'm looking forward for that. :)

I hope she can get through the interview and manage to secure a place for her. So that she's not going to waste her 5 months holiday of doing nothing except sleeping and eating. Like me. What a shame.

When I woke up this morning, I received a call thru Skype from Abah. Yeah, they're in Terengganu right now, attending my cousin's reception, and after that will head to Kelantan. How I wish I can join them.

However, it is so impossible. There are tonnes of assignments that await for me to finish them. Last week, we were given another assigment.Sigh.Next week, there will be two important presentations to be done.Sigh.

The most important thing is, there are less than 3 weeks for me to sit for the final exams and I still don't have the time even to thumb through the books!Sigh.

and what am I doing here, sighing all over? I should start typing the assignments now. Oh no, I should go for lunch first and then start typing the assignments. That's better, right?

Till then.


p/s: I'm thinking of blogging in English but sometimes I will use Malay too. This is the best way to improve and strengthen my English besides reading and listening to English songs. Just my 2 cents. =)

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Random Things #2 or #3

it's so obvious that i don't have any idea on what to write at the title part. and I am not even sure it should be 2 or 3. pffftt

salam and hi people!

it has been a long time since i wrote here. even my holiday diaries are still in the dashboard. and what's happening here? i'm writing in English?
Hellooo..EAW fever is not ending yet! HAHA.

FYI, EAW stands for English for Academic Writing, a subject taken this sem, merely about how to write a good thesis (for a beginner). The class is about 3 hours per day and 2 times per week, which will really make you feel tired about this English thingy.

But still I find learning English is better than Bahasa Melayu. Ooopss!

Mind you, during Form 4, I had once been one of the highest scorers in English but one of the lowest in BM. So ironic.And mama even said when she saw the result, "Anak mat salleh ke ni?". HAHA. that's funny -.-" Abah? Cool aje. "It's ok, try again next time." Cayalah!

Ok, i'm not trying to emphasize here that my English is good or whatsoever. I'm still a learner, an amateur. I think it's my primary school english classes had taught me everything. All my English teachers were all Indians. They were nice, but they could be as fierce as the lion. Seriously! I still remembered when I was in Standard 4, my English teacher had this habit; she would throw our books outside the class if she wasn't satisfied with the homework. I used to see my book flew with my own eyes, into the drain. Luckily, the drain was not wet. Yeah, luckily. And compared to Penulisan, I prefer English Essay. I can write pages of Essay but not for Penulisan. and sometimes, I don't even know how to start the introduction. But I still use BM as my first language. =)

oh, did I mention that today's title is Random Things? Does it relate to each other, Random Things and EAW? My bad , people. and I have a feeling that this entry is gonna be a long entry. It's up to you whether to read it till the final dot or just click the "X" there. =)

Now, a few trivia about this sem:

1) I have been able to finish about 4 novels - Thanks for the Memories by Cecelia Ahern, The Gatecrasher by Madeleine Wickham, The Shoe Princess's Guide to the Galaxy by Emma Boyd, and The Gap Year for Grown Ups by Annie Sanders. There are another 3 in the queue, which even me myself don't know when I can hold and read them.

2) This sem is the busiest sem I ever have, with tonnes of assignments, presentations and lab reports, not to mention that EAW report. Alhamdulillah, our group had finished while the other group still in the making process. Thanks to Madam M for making our lives so hectic the past few days. At least I managed to get few hours to sleep while some of my groupmates were not.

3)I'm going to receive a souvenir from Australia eveyone! HAHA. so sorry for over reacting. but hey, wouldn't u feel the same?  i'm not asking for it anyway, just giving a hint. HAHA. going to check for the parcel tomorrow!

4) My time management is so bad! I am not watching too much dramas this sem let alone to online. Thanks to the super slow Internet. I don't even have the chance to skype with my  family.I miss them so much. Do they miss me? I hope they do and will remember me during their trip to Terengganu this weekend. I'm not joining them for good. Hopefully. even though mama asked me to go from here. and I refused to do so.I'm not willing to go through the exhausting journey. not now.

5) The 5 months holiday really makes my body feels bad! I will feel tired quickly. When I went for jogging with Ru and Yana for the first time in this sem,I had realized my stamina had become so terribly terrible.I have to control my food intake. I'm doing it now. Never ever offer me something nice just to test my patience or else you will receive a glare or hear me whining. Thank you.

6) I had joined volleybal for the Interbatch Games. It was fun even though we couldn't bring back any medals. It's worth for an experience. The last time I had the ball in my hand was during Form 2. Yana called me Lady Gagah as I made a weird expression in the photo while everyone gave a lively one. Unfortunately, I can't upload it here.thanks to the super slow internet again.Yeah, seriously it is fun if you don't consider the muscle ache as the side effects. I have to take medicine prescribed to treat the inflammation. My face had got seriously tanned too. It's good for you not to play it outdoor especially when the sun is shining and scorching just above your head!

7) I already have my own jersey! with my name written on it! yeay! FANA with the word H for Halim, my father's name. instead of putting the letter for K or F (only my bestfriends know what is this). HAHA. consider it as an appreciation to my father. I'm a good daughter, am I? I''m so excited as this is my first time to own a jersey. even though managing them really gives me headache. It's not easy to handle 36 different requests in a short time!

8) My midterm results are not something that can be proud of. I had flunk a paper. maybe 2. badly. until it made me eating about 9 slices of Secret Recipe cakes.and later i regretted for doing that as it caused the fat in me to increase. what a terrible me. Thanks to Hanis, Yana, Akmar and Jibah for bringing me there and hearing me whining all evening. And i cried a river. In my heart at first.I won't show the sadness to anyone even to my family. Then, I desperately looked for a sad movie, and wasted so many pieces of tissues while watching it. And that's it. I'm Lady Gagah, remember? :')

Now, I have to work harder. Yes, Work harder, Dilligently and Intelligently. I have enjoyed so much and now I really need to put a full stop to it. I have to think of my goals frequently.

9) I have this one habit, reading blogs written by overseas students. Pagihari.solarstreak.com has always been my favorite.Amri, u are such amazing talented people! and the latest, Hanafedora.co.uk. thanks to wawa for recommending this blog! it's marvellous! they are like my motivator and my inspiration. One day, I'm gonna be like them. Insyaallah. do pray for me! =)

10) Tomorrow i'll be having 2nd quiz for Genetics. and what am I doing now? I should hit the books!


till then. toodles!